Caleb Michael’s Song

Jesus loves me this I know.

For the Bible tells me so.
Little ones to Him belong.
They are weak but He is strong.

O Lord, I really need Your comfort today.
My heart is heavy and inside I ache.
What once was filled with life is now a barren place.
And I’m left here feeling empty and in need of Your grace.

Dear Jesus please sing a sweet lullaby,
To my baby I’ll never hear cry.
Who will never lie close to my breast.
Gently cradle and give him rest.

Jesus, You’re the only one who can heal this mother’s grief.
Whose hopes and dreams have vanished as if taken by a thief.
My soul has labored through sorrow, pain, and tears,
So all I ask You Jesus, is that You hold my baby near.
And then…

Dear Jesus please sing a sweet lullaby.
To my baby I’ll never hear cry.
Who will never lie close to my breast,
Gently cradle and give him rest.

I sometimes wonder if his eyes are blue.
And what’s he thinking now as he looks up at You.
Won’t you tell him I love him, and I’m waiting for the day.
When my arms will hold him and until then I pray.

Dear Jesus please sing a sweet lullaby,
To my baby I’ll never hear cry.
Who will never lie close to my breast,
Gently cradle and give him rest.

Little ones to him belong,
They are weak and He is strong.

Words and Music Copyright 2011 Rebecca S. Hedrick


 

CALEB MICHAEL’S SONG

In August of 1994  I became pregnant with our second baby.  Our firstborn was just 8 months old and she was such a joyous addition to our lives that the prospects of another baby had us absolutely delighted.  But almost as soon as we became aware of our newly forming little one the pregnancy began exhibiting signs of trouble.

We went for tests and ultrasound results indicated that no heartbeat was detected, though due to the very early stage of the pregnancy it might not have been able to be detected at that point.  Hearing the words “no heart beat” was as though someone had punched us square in the middle, that moment when you can’t catch your breath after you’ve had the wind knocked out of you.  And yet in the uncertainty we continued to hold out hope against hope against losing our baby, praying for God to intervene and jumpstart our baby’s little heart and right whatever was going wrong inside of me.

Weeks passed and my symptoms and bloodwork continued to display signs of continued pregnancy causing speculation that there may have been twins, that one may not have survived but another may yet be viable.  With our emotions tossed about on a rollercoaster of apprehension and hope, we prayed and waited…until finally our waiting ended and our hope turned to tears.  Our baby, (or babies), were destined for heaven and the arms of Jesus while ours remained empty.

Caleb Michael’s Song came in the weeks following, in the hollowness of our grief, as a conversation with God, never meant to be heard outside of my private room of prayer.  As I strove to express my heart to God in this song-prayer His presence enveloped me with His love and I felt His urging to finish the song and share it with others; that it would be a song of hope and healing to touch others who had lost their babies – through miscarriage, stillbirth, premature death, the loss of adoption, and through abortion – with His healing love.

So, I set about its conclusion but could not find the right words.  I went to Scott and told him what the Lord spoke to my heart and his response became the final verse, “I sometimes wonder if his eyes are blue…”  And as our baby in heaven came into being by collaboration, so did the birth of our song, “Caleb Michael’s Song.”

Many of you have stories to tell of the losses of your babies, still carrying the silent grief of those losses.  I pray if that is you, you would fall into the arms of Jesus and allow Him to carry your sorrow, for those same arms are the ones that stretched out on the cross to bear your grief, and the same ones that hold your precious baby hopefully awaiting your arrival in heaven one day.  I pray you would receive His healing love and embrace the blessed hope of eternal life in Him.  For one day we will be with Him face to face and be reunited with those little ones we long to hold and know.